Intergalactic DRM: Solar Storms and the Reckoning to Come

In 1859 there was a solar storm so tough that telegraph wires burst into flames. The exact same thing is going to happen again in 2012, which, if you are a crazy person, will seem awfully convenient. The sun is constantly owning us - busting up our RAIDs, tiring out our sheep, and generally entropying our shit up.

And while the flaming telegraph thing is probably something to do with how stupidly long those wires were... you know... maths... scientists still recommend that you should start wrapping your ipod in pink bats sometime around 2011.

Do you need to wrap all your electronic devices? Well, only the ones you want to keep.

What does this have to do with copyright, the internet blackout, and Judith Tizzard? YOUR TORRENTS WILL ALL BE BURNT UP BY THE FUCKING SUN.

Then, thankfully, we can all return to happily paying out the ass for mechanical reproductions of mainstream dross produced by a crowd of ageing industry insiders. And Chloe Smith will be able to pay off her car or whatever. The End.

[Yeah I know stuff from our sun isn't so much 'intergalactic'. I'm really sorry.]

Who Runs This Cat Game?

Yeah so i seen this busted out glasses lens on the ground and got to thinking, why the fuck not make a space helmet for a cat?

Well what do you know, I actually kind of followed through on an idea for once and made one.

Obviously it needs ear-holes, a sweet paint job, and Monty is not playing ball, so a co-operative cat would be an advantage, and a personality disorder that allowed me to ignore a cat's distress at not wanting to be suffocated. Aside from all that though, I'm quite pleased with myself for a job half done.

2008 Makes Out With Own 1st Cousin. Blames 'Recession, Lighting'.

2008 was over quicker than it even began. And like every other hugely popular thing it's time for HAB4U to look back on a year and tell you the things that were good and the things that were not good at all. The only thing I remember about the last year was following US politics a lot but not really caring about it that much. Now that it's all black over there I suggest paying heaps and heaps of attention to your local council politics instead. In fact maybe that will be the ANEWBLOG.

So anyway, you'll hear a lot of people saying ignorant shit like "it's just another day really" when talking about the New Years. They so often chuck the 'really' on because deep down they know that they're definitely wrong. As well as it being justabit of a big fucking deal to God to see his planet go round the universe again, perfectly as always, this particular round also signals the following key shifts:

2008	2009
Listening to music	Don't. It sucks
Marine life	Minerals that can 'think'
Quitting smoking	HAW HAW HAW
Bacon	Recession Bacon
Crying in the shower	Crying in the bath
Computers	Child slaves
Reading that book	Acting like you might of
Secret Herbs and Spices	Obvious Herbs and Spices
Rape-based humour	Actual humour
Theses	Thesez
Sisters	Mothers

But apart from that everything else will be pretty much exactly the same. Except for the things which have their own tragic momentum and which you thought you might be able to stop - binge-peppering, replying to those texts from vodafone telling you you're nearly out of credit - those things will just get way worse.

I know there are exceptions, but it's true for most people most years. So it's definitely probably true for you right now.