Our inboxes groan with anonymous swears and spittle-smeared demands for sexy new posts. But the posts can not come. Until our glorious rebirth.
Luckily everything we've ever wanted to say is here .
And so: carry on for now. A community rich, whole and undivided; blank contentless screenburn a broken plate at some Mediterranean wedding. Everyone is a little sunburned and thirsty. No, you can not take a plate outside.
Goodbye for now.
What happened? At the developers' conference? The usual:
1. Pleasantries.
2. Discussion of things about blogs.
3. Decide Roparty will do it, because code is hard.
4. Record conference theme song.
5. Watch kids dancing.
Na but seriously, this blog is pretty much on hold until we emerge, butterfly like, from the sweaty crumb-filled sleeping-bag of development. The sleeping bag is the cocoon. We'll keep you all posted.
Update:
Here's our conference theme-scape:
It's happening. Probably this Sunday. Anyone interested should drop a line. For those too fucking lazy to skype in there will naturally be a comprehensive live-blog of the outcome. What might that outcome look like? A new site-design work-flow code super-roadway.
If you're an advertiser, then you should pull your kids out of their dubious private school and sell them to the mongrel mob. Because our CPMs will bankrupt you. If you're an investor, then you just tripled your carbon footprint, increased your height slightly, and gave your family a decent reason to mask their contempt for you. This is your time. But you'll probably fuck it up. See you there.
This place has thousands of these. Channel conflict. Market-send-awayness. Why would you ever come back? Bye.
From memory this honour - which drives about as much traffic as that tattoo my dad got - is given out for courageously Wire-heavy coverage of local scandals.
Staff: If any of you have any family, or a SO, this is probably the time to tell them that you are secret journalists.
Stephen Wolfram was a child prodigy who made a shit load of cash from developing a program that will do your math home work for you. But instead of blowing all of his cash on hookers and blow like any self-respecting engineer, he decided to write some bullshit book about how even the most simple things are as complicated as fuck and that the universe is actually some kind of giant 2 dimensional black and white XOR statement or something.
Anyway... this post isn't actually about that loon... it's a plug for this site. The segway being this virtualization of Wolfram's cellular automata crap.
Some of you may know the site's creator as the guy holding the cabbage... some of you went to his party and criticized his crappy art purchases... the rest of you should check out the cool apps and flash (with source)...
Pro Tip: don't use an inferior operating system if you want to dazzle the hell out of your cohabitators with an awesome screen saver.
If you haven't been picked up and carried away by a giant bird then you should count yourself lucky. BECAUSE IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME. The culprits tend to be either giant Eagles or THUNDERBIRDS, which are very real ginormous birds. Here is a book about them that you can buy. But that wont stop them. It would take 5 Barack Obamas to stop just a baby one, and even then just for a moment.
If you care at all about the safety of your family and pets then you should probably check out Biofort, the most credible authority on giant birds grabbing kids and owning them for ever. His blog is actually pretty good, and his theory on the Mattoon gasser makes a lot more sense than the psychological explanations (assuming that his facts are straight, which they almost certainly aren't).
PS: The crypto in Cryptozoology means definitely true. And this blog is now about cryptozoology.
Adding fuel to the already fast-burning-intern-and-forced-capitalised-title sun which is the NEW DAWN there is also another thing: If anyone sends in a banner it will become The Banner. For a while. Or not at all if it sucks. Just like giving people writing jobs that they didn't ask for and which pay no money, banners is another word for ending recessions for ever.
So is this how it should be now? Post up things that mildly interested me whenever I can be bothered? Even if it's something I saw on some other site? Maybe. Here's a thing:
Interesting Stuff. Also, how fucked off am I going to be when someone else gets in and registers this before me:Dancing mania was a social phenomenon that occurred primarily in mainland Europe between the 14th and 18th centuries; it involved groups of people, sometimes thousands at a time, who danced uncontrollably and bizarrely, seemingly possessed by the devil. Men, women, and children would dance through the streets of towns or cities, sometimes foaming at the mouth until they collapsed from fatigue.
Right now everything I do on any site that has anything to do with google, except google, is hanging and jumping and stalling and taking fucking YEARZ. It's almost like Telecom NZ is TRAFFIC SHAPING MY GOOGLE STUFF. And trust me, you wont be reading that in the toothless, cowering, rimfest known as any and every New Zealand tech blog ever.
The whole situation got me wound up enough that I made the following comment on someone's youtube video:
oh jesus christ are those beards on one of your faces? or just shit? because if beards then there is no hope for your souls. like, if you could have any non-troll part of this at an age where you can produce pubes of any sort then you are just waaay waaaaay too fucked to even imagine living. so kill yourself.
As you can see, I'm kind of proud of that one. With that off my chest I descended into the bowel of the internet. But all I found was Boxxy. Jesus.
Just as opiates don't work nearly as well the next night this blog also has no new stuff on it. And the stuff it does have is complete shit. With any luck an internet van will pick it up and molest it so thoroughly that it never speaks again until the end of the movie when it learns to trust again because people didn't give up on it. See what I'm saying dicks?
Welcome to the HAB4U interim redesign. Basically despite frequent requests there have been no game-changing theme suggestions. So you people get nothing. Well... you get this 90s-zine type thing... blame yourself.
The really disappointing thing about this announcement is how it bumps down that picture of the ghost-catching girl. I picked it during a deep wave of frustration caused by the crapiness of her show. But now I've calmed down a bit, and it has taken on a hypnotic quality. Her goofy smile has taken over my soul. Fuck it. I'm going to skype her ass.
Tomorrow I will be making a bunch of waffles (with whipped cream and bacon) and eating them while I watch the US election. I will be liveblogging the whole process, so tune in from around 8PM UTC/GMT. Or 9AM NZ time. Yeah that's right. Probably while you're at work.
Keep those crowd-sourced blog themes coming. I believe that at this point we have around a thousand. The basic push has been for a blog more focused on the film 'snakes on a plane'. Also the warnings in the bible. I guess those are fairly ROFLRANDOM AS ideas. But not really. In fact you guys are shit. Think of something awesome.
